Saturday, August 7, 2010

..............A Gratuitous Confession....................

Since two years I didn't had enough time to write any better things. My life became so natural, melodramatic,mechanical and mundane each and every Second. One of my friend who is interested in reading my posts(I consider she is the only one showing interest in reading my posts) has often asked me to write something which I believe is the greatest achievement in my life so far. Life had offered me plenty of opportunities,lots of courage,support and strength to face it which I was unable to utilise or not in the mood of utilising them productively. Ever since I had posted something earlier I did not find anything so gripping and inspiring to put it on. Mind you I don't dare to say that my earlier posts or interesting or not but may be a little candid. I often feel that its better not to pen unless its extremely captivating for the readers(if any).


Literally speaking I have experienced so many strong emotions such as Grief, Misery, Atonement and Success in this period without my knowledge of the surroundings. It gave me a superlative pleasure whenever I failed during an attempt towards my career. Finally I got a break through not because I am truly intelligent or dedicated but since I am compromising and least demanding.I came across in-numerous extremists during the course of building my career who tried to exploit every single available source to its best with their limited apprehension. I often wondered why people stick to their profession but couldn't get appropriate answer for that. When I was lonely and grief stricken romancing with my life I came to realize that profession is one such thing which simulates our psyche keeping us away from distractions. Due to this very reason I tried hard to concentrate on my profession but in vain since my knowledge is poor and my scope is limited by radicals. I have written many useless quotations and reasons for my behaviour in almost every social networking site that I came across and hence exhausted by doing so. But confessing a crime after committing and admitting a mistake after doing doesn't resolve the issue at once. This fact is well known all over the world and the people who use it are all inclined towards rationalizing the circumstances so as to be benefited by them.

I was so helpless and frustrated at times and went to an extent of virtually intruding many lives. During my earlier encounters towards a bright Career I had a very good relation and acquaintance with Hyderabad and some pals. All of a sudden a sudden everything seemed to be dull and dimwitted with the advent of new profession into my career which made me often depressed. Initially I was astonished by the capricious behaviour of the individuals in pairing up but to be practical its the best thing to stay away from loneliness. It was then that I realised what my ambition is, where and when to initiate it.

Generally egotism or selfishness arises out of the fear that Individuals may be helpless by anyone during senile or other stages which makes them self centered. These kind of people can never be called selfish since its basic survival instinct of living being based on the fact Survival of the Fittest.If everybody on earth knows the other person this egotism can be Vanished. There Comes this concept and my Life time Ambition "INTEGRATION OF LIFE" . It seemed a bit awkward and incomprehensible whenever somebody heard this due to lack of proper establishment of a my genuine Intention. Often I think that everybody has to spend some time with themselves so as to understand their real need for existence on earth. Think Over it. It may be Helpful or Useless. :)


Tuesday, October 14, 2008

........A Splendour At Night.........


"Ha this bus sucked my last ounce of blood have to refresh myself",I heaved a seigh of relief as I headed towards my destiny i.e., my home.Beep Beep "Going to be a new bond tonight.Careful dude",my mobile phone beeped once."Huh this corporate mobile companies doesn't have any work at any point of time.Always delivering useless alerts.Hmmm wait a minute "going to be a new bond" oooo sounds gr8".I was on my way to refresh myself at a snacks stor."Bhaiyya ek plate pani poori do"a local slang to the snacks store person.I found a girl just beside me eating something.I thot abt my mobile alert.Fyn for da first tym the mobile alert is going to be true.I finished eating and just tried to follow her to make the mobile company feel proud abt deir about their alerts.

"Heyaa wait a moment please",I screamed as I reached her."Wat" a sarcastic reply from her but not a bad start."Can I have a walk with you",I sounded a little formal."Hmmmm this road belongs to the government I hope",she rushed without my reply."Okay wats your name",less fromal this time."Well Iam Sandhya.Working for Infosys,drawing 30k per month.Is this enuff for you",a harsh reply i thot."Im Anand Sastry shortly Nandu.Hi",I raised my hand towards her to have a shake.She looked at me and folded her hands to put a traditional namaskaar."Ohh gr8 you seem to be orthodox right",I said in a promoting tone."Yeah" a one liner from her."Can you sound a little bit modern",I asked her."Abt wat",she gave an instant reply."Your name seems little out of place to infosys",I added flavour to the conversation."Should I rejuvenate it"she said as both of crossed the signal."Well there is no harm in being modern right",I said trying to use my GRE skills."Right then im Sandy",little useful reply.Wow Nandu weds Sandy the names are matched and rhyming too I thot in my mind.

"Shall we exchange some more info",I asked with some hope."Fine wat do u do",she took the initiative for the first time."Me.Iam a Graduate trying to grab an opportunity from the IT industry",I replied in a well struck mode."It seems dat you are searching hard",she is trying to concentrate on me I hope.Well my wish is fulfilled a bit I thot in mind."Well now that u r working for a top most IT company in India you know everything about US economy and the downfall of IT companies now a days right",I used my G.K this time trying hard to impress her through."Not much you may try better rather than worrying about US economy which is not at all related to us",she is getting more n more interested on me hmmm great."Let it be.Do u watch movies",now I replied trying to share my interests."Rock On Hey yeah waqt kaa ishaaraa.I hope I luv this song and movie very much",she replied.I felt lil excited and said "Wow I too just liked the movie and song.Seems that we are like minded.Gud Gud",I promoted the conversation meanwhile we overcame by a biker(Is dat the proper word).

He stopped a bit forward from us.The girl with whom I was talking just crossed me and climbed the bike.She replied "Fine Nandu this is my hubby Varun.He too works for Infosys and my colleague too.We had a trouble with petrol a lil earlier so he rushed leaving me alone.Nice meeting you Nandu"."Then wat abt me.I thot we are like minded",I sounded lil dull loosing my hope."Well thats wat one opts wen u care abt useless things like US economy and me.Be more productive in your work dude.Adiosssssss",she left waving a hand to me.

Beep Beep"Stop pestering about broken bond.Sort out new"
Bloody Hellllllllllllllllllllll...........................

Friday, November 30, 2007

The train(Sum journeys r worth more)



The train is passing by.I cant divert my attention from her thats the impact she had on me with in a short span.Occassionally i looked out of da window but da nature seemed pretty unusual coz im sitting infront of an angel.The journey continued and a station named "Rajahmundry" came and i got down to have a break.I was standing near a higgin bothoms stall lookin at a novel of my favourite author.Iam so amazed about da prologue of da novel dat i cant even hear da announcement of train leavin da station.As soon as i sensed da departure of train i was on my foot towards train running in a hurry.The door is just two foot away from me but i cant hold it.I tried to scream for a help but to my utter ashtonishment i found a hand coming towards me for help.I was thinking dat dis hand would be the girl's hand(Had a dream duet also ) but surprised to see a guy after gettin in to da train and thanked him for his help.I went to my berth n tried to continue my luv story.


The man who gave me his hand to me for help is sitting opposite to both of us( i mean girl and me).I was getting da feeling dat i've seen him somewhere.After a short while i recognised him as my schoolmate Gopi who used to be an average student in our class ofcourse im also the same.At first i think he was going to attend any interview somewhere in chennai,but i saw a young lady 22 years of age sitting beside him.Finally thought dat they r run away couple and wanted to know about them.I went to him and asked how r u and do u recognise me.He said oh ya"how can i forget you.U r da one whom i used to admire most in my childhood".I was so impressed by dat compliment.With dat i thought i can ask him about her.He replied "she is my wife,And we r going to vijayawada to get help from my father's friend.I think there will be any job there".I was surprised to see dat his wife was pregnant in such a short age.


Meanwhile the girl whom i was seeing got engaged with his wife and they r talking like a good friends.I was again tryin to look at da girl but thought dat it would be better to make a conversation with her after tha couple will leave da train.I found my friend gopi talking with someone in his mobile,after a little while he came and asked me"hey john would u please gimme ur mobile coz i ran out of time with my mobile".I replied "oh sure please go ahead"and gave him my mobile.He took da mobile and gave me after sumtym.After a one and half hour journey da couple r nearing their destination i.e., vijayawada.I was trying to trying to take a short nap,but woke up hearing a large scream from Gopi's wife.I asked Gopi wats da matter he said that the chain worn by his wife was lost.His wife was crying about the chain Gopi said to me "Hey john this chain is wat im going to sell and get money to get a job.But now its lost how can i get a job without money.
Anything in dis world is linked with money".By saying these words he burst out of tears.I felt pity for him and gave him my number to call me if he needs any help (felt little guilty that im trying to execute supremacy over him).The station came and Gopi thanked me and said dat "i will call if i need any help" and left da trian with his wife.


It took me another half an hour to get out of dat situation.To divert my mood i tried to chat with that girl.She also showed intrest and we both r talking.I found a chain in her hand and asked her how much it costs.She said "i dont know.May be ur friend Gopi knows".I was terribly ashtonished hearing those words.I asked her "are u a theif"she replied "im a graduate and an unemployee.I did not stole it from gopi's wife.When they r about to leave da train i found this chain lying down my berth.Still they r in da train but i did not reveal it to them".


I asked her " why you have done like dis.I thought you as an angel in my first impression.But now i believe dat "appearences are deceptive".I thought that she will be deeply hurt by listening these words and gives me an apology.But she spoke softly"Everyone in dis world needs money for their existence.I need this chain to get money for my father's heart operation in chennai.I never tried to cheat anyone.But im not the one to loose any opurtunity that costs my father's life".I opposed her that"But this money would help Gopi and his wife in their search towards a job.So wat do u say about that".
She said "In this world if anyone needs to be happy then his neighbours must be hurt otherwise how on earth would a person be happy.Let us take an example of Gopi.If he sells dis chain he would get money and obtain job.But dis job he got not out of his worth.There r so many worthy people other than Gopi to obtain dat job.Its da money which made dis thing to happen.He's happy becoz the persons who r not selected for da job r unhappy.Thats it"